A fellow dressed as a thermometer, with a giant red sphere suspended
via lots of tape over his crotch. I kept thinking of the codpieces worn
by Alex and his droogs in A Clockwork Orange.
- My dear pal Liz, wrapped in a sheet, arms tucked inside her T-shirt
to approximate the Venus de Milo. Which Liz, with her sense of serene
entitlement, already does anyway. Which means we probably didn't need to
cover her face with toxic white paint to sell the illusion, but I'm
glad I got to do that nonetheless.
Mars - Roman god of war, as indicated by his plastic helmet, chest-plate and sword.
- My buddy Derek, wearing a pink yarmulke and brown trousers, and
exclaiming "Oy vey!" with a decidedly un-semitic fervor each time he
missed a (pretend) golf shot with his (real) putter. A Jew-putter, do you see?
you: The guys who wrote this puzzle, Dave Barry, Tom Schroder and Gene
Weingarten, have at least three Pulizers among them. What do you want me
to say? Derek also MacGuyvered together the box-top and tree-branch
trident I carry in the photo after the prop promised by Post Hunt
organizers failed to materialize.
Saturn - My
friend Alexis, who blew both hips out hula-hooping around the square all
afternoon to depict the rings of Saturn. She'll never walk again. The
Washington Post Company thanks her for her efforts and reminds her she
is an independent contractor.
Uranus - Annie
Mueller, long-suffering housemate of my friend Rachel, who roped all of
us into this, wearing a gigantic, strap-on butt with backpack straps.
Neptune - Hi! My Getty image is now available in a variety of sizes, formats and licensing options.
Prices start at Really?! and go as high as You Must Be Fucking Kidding Me. I am entitled to a royalty of 0.00% of all sales, so please give generously. My eyes are up here, by the way. Jerk.